The Areas of My Expertise

by John Hodgman #10
What can I say about this unusual volume that isn't already stated on the cover? Probably nothing. (the italics are quotes directly from aforementioned cover)

What is it?
An almanac of complete world knowledge compiled with instructive annotation and arranged in useful order by me, JOHN HODGMAN a professional writer, in
THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE which include: Matters Historical, Matters Literary, Matters Cryptozoological, Hobo Matters, Food, Drink, Cheese (a Kind of Food), Squirrels & Lobsters & Eels, Haircuts, Utopia, What Will Happen in the Future, and Most other Subjects.

Why would you want to read it?
Finally, I may conclude that you are a curious person who thirsts for knowledge, for this is in fact a compendium of COMPLETE WORLD KNOWLEDGE. Here you shall find answers to all the questions you have been asking.

For example, you ask "What is the truth about the Loch Ness monster?"

THE ANSWER IS PROVIDED.

You ask, "Who were the U.S. Presidents who had hooks for hands?"

THE ANSWER IS PROVIDED.

"what was the menu at the first Thanksgiving," you ask, "and did it include eels?"

Technically, that is two questions, but do not apologize, for I shall answer them both... LATER.

Like all, you wonder, "What will happen in the future?"

A SIMPLE CHART OF OMENS AND PORTENTS PROVIDES THE ANSWER, and I am the author of that chart.

If that isn't enough to convince you... here are some author testimonials:
" If Borges and Ben Franklin got drunk and decided to write a book together, the result might have been something a lot like this freaky 'almanac' -- an eccentric compendium of useless trivia, fabricated facts, outlandish speculation, and sublime nonsense. John Hodgman is witty, urbane, and completely out to lunch." -- Tom Perrotta.

"If you are a hobo and/or a con artist who aspires to hunt mythical creatures and/or raise utopian bunny rabbits, John Hodgman's The Areas of my Expertise will profoundly change your life. If you are neither of these things (or if you possess neither of those goals), thi will simply be the funniest book you have read in the past twenty-four to thirty-six months. Mr. Hodgman is an irascible force of nature, a riverboat gambler, and a comedic kick in the jowls; his thoughts intrigue me." -- Chuck Closterman

for further information, you can visit the Areas Of My Expertise blog.