deadline eating my brain

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Monday, March 14, 2005
This deadline is eating my brain like funyuns. Yes, that's right. My brain is now the consistency and color of artificial puffed styrofoam onion rings. Project was supposed to go out today, and right now is the time it should be at UPS. It is in pieces on the living room floor. I figured out pretty quickly today that shipping was not going to happen, so I beseeched and was granted clemency, Hallelujah! But only for one day- which is fine, because I am so very sick of this project right now. I am reading over notes I've received along the way and second guessing EVERYTHING. Plus, the directions for the four binders I have to do are so confusing. Am I supposed to scan every damned thing in addition to swatching and sampling?? Because that's not going to happen.

I know that this first project will be the worst because I have to get over my learning curve for everything, instead of just the new things. I am really grateful for this opportunity, but I have to bitch. I am so tired, I have no clean clothes, and it looks like an atomic grade craft-bomb went off in the living room. A living room which I share with two other people who are certainly more tired of it than I am.

I think I will go take a shower, try to find a clean shirt that is OK to get paint all over, and pour myself another Diet Max. (Albertson's had ZERO bottles of diet coke yesterday, so I was forced into house brand. Which tastes like diet rite, tab, and road grit. Copious application of lemon helps. I've had this at other people's houses and it never tasted like this. So, now I think not only was the grocery store out of the real deal, but they had a bad batch of the imitator as well.)

With luck I will cheer up when it is time to send the invoice!
10 comments on "deadline eating my brain"
  1. Jen! You always do such a good job being all rational that you leave me with nothing encouraging to say - you already know it all! Try not to kick yourself for being all perfectionist-ey because it's that quality that makes your work so awesome. (Even though it makes your brain become snack food like.)
    I wish you many epiphanies!

  2. I am sure you did a fabulous job! You're so neurotic about whether what you're doing is "good enough". I won't tell you not to be, because I am that way too and I know it won't help. The stuff you showed me the other day was awesome. I am sure they are going to LOVE it! If they don't (which is totally NOT going to happen!), they are total asshats and you can tell them I said so. Or, better yet, I will write them my own "Dear Modern Bride" style letter. I am almost old enough to pull it off now, and I'll do it for you, even if it does mean missing Matlock! It'll be easier next time, when you have this first project behind you and know what to expect. Until then, keep your liquid road grid ultra-cold and don't forget the lemon!

  3. p.s. I forgot to tell you, I translated the poem on my blog for you. It's in one of the comments

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  5. You guys are sweet!! I totally cop to being neurotic about this stuff. I wish I could just switch off that part of my brain and just do what I do without making myself suffer over everything. So lame! As for being rational... hee hee. It doesn't feel so rational here on the inside of my funyuns, but I thank you anyway! Leslita, your epiphany wishes came through! I had a "what the hell am I freaking out about" zen moment late last night and I feel much better today!
    Martina - you don't get to be writing Grandpa Simpson Modern Bride Magazine letters for a while yet. I have it on good authority (TV!!!) that 30 is the new 20. But I really appreciate that you are willing to do it! hee.

  6. Wait...30 is the new 20??? And just when I was starting to chill out a little bit, too!

    "Until then, keep your liquid road grid ultra-cold and don't forget the lemon!" I have no idea what this means but it sounds like super great advice and I think I'll start dispensing it to people immediately!

  7. Doh! That was supposed to be "road griT", not grid, though I am kind of liking grid, because it makes it that much more enigmatic. Either way, I think it's a valuable piece of advice for us all. Frankly, I've become quite wise now that I'm almost closer to 40 than 30. Lemon covers a multitude of sins, including cheap, pseudo-beverage (aka Diet Max).

    Jen - Did you get your stuff sent off? I can't wait until the fruits of your labors contuse to persuade them that you are brilliant.

  8. hee hee! Grid or grit?! grid or grit? decisions, decisions. They both sound delicious. I think road grid would make better random advice though.

    I have sent off the big part of the thing! yay! The other one that I have to do will be much less crazy-making because a) I have already gone crazy once, and b) it is a smaller project all-around. Of course I had some minor qualms because I still have feelings that it probably sucked, but I am suppressing them - because what's the point?!? Yay, suppression!!

    One day I will have to tell Leslita my contuse to persuade shame. hee hee. I think it is a perfectly legitimate reading, myself.

  9. Hey, I LIKE "contuse to pursuade". It makes sense in a my way or the highway (en route to the hospital!) kind of way.

  10. Took me time to read the whole article, the article is great but the comments bring more brainstorm ideas, thanks.

    - Johnson


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